Not a fan of UEFA Euro? Make it exciting with sex toys!
It’s that time again. We probably won’t be cheering en masse at pubs, squares and stadiums, but this likely won’t stop your man. So what do you do when your football-loving husband retreats for a month with beer, a large screen and a mountain of snacks? Sex toys it is!
Of course not every guy spontaneously shows off his Messi moves as soon as UEFA Euro is approaching, but excitement is taking over a good chunk of the male species right now. Special group chats are being created, living rooms are being transformed into football-fever temples and garages are being expertly converted into football mancaves. Including a huge screen of course. Those dribbling feet don’t look the same on a simple flatscreen, that goes without saying.
Football fever often doesn’t take hold of women as much. Sure, there are plenty of women who closely watch every match. But there are also many women who don’t care at who’ll eventually win that cup at Wembley Stadium, women who just serve the obligatory beers and snacks to a group of shouting men before quickly running upstairs to watch a new episode of The Crown on Netflix.
A ball of testosterone!
At the same time, we can imagine that the sight of 22 sweating fit boys triggers something inside of you. We’re not talking about visions of winning that cup obviously, that would be crazy. And not about visions of huge victory parties either. No, we mean something else, something tingling and sensual.
Don’t be embarrassed. It makes total sense that large ball of testosterone wouldn’t make your blood rush to your intimate area. Viking Kjaer on the football field? Come on. Pique, who holds the line with his Liam Hemsworth face? Swoon. Neymar and his ever-changing haircut? Lord, give me strength.
Score some sex toys!
With this much masturbation material on your screen, it may be a good idea to skip The Crown for now. Try to ignore the yelling, the wall of sound produced by vuvuzelas and the collective howl when the ball ends up in the wrong goal and sneak off to your bedroom. Because the best assist is and will always be your very own vibrator!
So, if you’re in the mood for some solo sex for lack of the real thing, then UEFA Euro is the best moment to expand your collection of sex toys for a month of unbridled self-love! Of course we’re here to help you with some tips for the best, most enjoyable and most surprising sex toys in our online shop. Ready? Here they are!
Rotating and vibrating Rabbit Vibe
With 25 settings and 3 powerful motors, this pink Rabbit Vibe can give you everything you want. The toy both rotates and vibrates for extra pleasure and is even completely waterproof. Making the most of your time in the bathtub while your boyfriend spends his time shouting at the TV downstairs? Oh, yes!
Vice – double vibrator
With this colourful powerhouse you won’t know which way is up anymore. Vice stimulates your G-spot, clitoris and anus at the same time and the rotation of the beads are guaranteed to blow you away. Who needs that beer-drinking caveman downstairs anyway? Not you!
Lewis Realistic Vibrator
Are you starting to miss your football-watching lover a little bit? Then this lifelike vibrator is what you need. The veined shaft and realistic glans and balls makes masturbating while fantasising about the real thing very easy. The material feels like real skin, which makes the exerience even more intense. With 10 different vibration settings there is always a perfect choice for you!
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Phil Realistic VibratorEasyToys Online Only£24.99£15.99 -
Lewis Realistic Vibrator - 22 cmReal Fantasy£49.99£33.99
We-Vibe Chorus
This duo vibrator with adjustable middle part always fits your body perfectly. Now you can be sure that both your G-spot and your clitoris get the attention they deserve. This toy, which has 10 intense vibration settings, is even completely ‘connected’. This means that you can connect your toy to your phone. You can also ask your partner to control your toy while he is watching football downstairs. That way you can be together, even though you are apart.
Vibrating panties
If you don’t want to miss any of those hunks on the football field, but you’re still in the mood for self-pleasure, vibrating panties are what you want. They have a special compartment that holds a small stimulator. With the wireless remote control, you can switch between 12 vibrating settings while you swoon over all those beautiful male specimens. And your man? He probably won’t even notice, but that doesn’t make it any less fun!
We don’t need anyone to score!
So. You’re not exactly looking forward to hearing about football for a whole month? Having a partner who suddenly doesn’t show any interest in your brand-new negligee and is constantly glued to football apps on his phone? There’s nothing more annoying that football fever, but we won’t be defeated by it. You really don’t have to be a footballer to be able to score. We can do that all on our own. So get your sex toys and… goal!
Also read: The best high-end sex toys for women
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