The importance of self-love

Love plays an important part in our lives. But when we hear the word ‘love’, we mainly think of love for our partner, our (grand)children, our friends, you name it. But there’s so much more than that. Love is great to give and to receive, so why do we often forget to give ourselves some love?

Focus on what you have, not what is still to come.

In a world of perfectionists where having a career and making a lot of money is practically the norm, it’s quite difficult to be kind to ourselves. We spend too much time focussing on what we still have to achieve. We have to work harder, go to the gym at least three times a week, eat healthier, and be nice to everyone. Of course there’s no harm in some critical self-reflection every now and then, but make sure that you don’t take this too far.

Put yourself first for a change

We grow up learning that being selfish is bad. Patiently wait your turn and think of others, not just yourself. Being cocky is not appreciated. Unfortunately, self-love is often still seen as just an excuse for being selfish; a reason to do whatever you want. However, truly loving yourself goes much deeper than that. It’s not about doing whatever you want, but about loving, appreciating, and accepting everything about yourself, no matter the circumstances. Self-love is knowing that you have the right to be here and that you are enough. It’s about loving yourself and embracing all your good and bad qualities.

It’s not about doing whatever you like, but about loving, appreciating, and accepting yourself.

I love me

Do you find it difficult to develop more self-love? Try saying this to yourself at least once a day: “I love you”. Give yourself a pat on the back at least three times a day when you’ve done something good. Don’t be too hard on yourself! Do it when you’ve cooked a nice dinner for example, or poured a drink for your partner, or took your children to swimming lessons, or when you just feel like you’re doing great and you can be proud of yourself. Practicing self-love every day will make you realise more and more that you’re unique. You’ll loose your blinds and you’ll be able to clearly see everything that is special and beautiful about you. Eventually, you’ll see that you really already are that power woman you’ve always wanted to be. Your self-worth will increase, you’ll be proud of who you are, and you’ll believe that you deserve happiness. Once you’re in this mindset, it will be noticeable to the outside world as well. And that, my beautiful, won’t just be good for you, but is also a huge inspiration for those you love and everyone else you know.

Reading tip: Nynke’s column about confidence