Mutual masturbation: how to do it

Have you ever considered masturbating together with your partner? Most people masturbate on their own, even when they are in a relationship. And that is fine of course! Still, mutual masturbation can be a fun and exciting addition to your sex life. How can you masturbate together? How do you start or suggest it to your partner? We will tell you in this blog post.

Mutual masturbation: what is it?

Mutual masturbation is a special way of self-pleasuring: you focus on your own pleasure, while your partner simultaneously does the same. You can do this for example while you’re lying in bed together or when you take a shower with your partner!

Has your sex life become a little bland? Then mutual masturbation can be the exciting boost you need. Use it as foreplay for example: you will turn each other on by watching each other masturbate. It is also an opportunity to learn some things, because during mutual masturbation you see first-hand how your partner pleasures himself or herself, and you can use that technique on your partner the next time you have sex.

Mutual masturbation: talk about it

If you want to masturbate, you don’t have to discuss this with your partner. However, if you want to try mutual masturbation, then of course it is important to discuss it first. Just like when you are having sex with your partner, both of you need to feel good about it. So start a conversation about mutal masturbation. Tell your lover that you want to try it and why you think it will be fun. You can tell your partner that you masturbate occassionally – if that is the case – and you can ask your partner about their experiences. It is important to keep the conversation positive: don’t judge each other and try not to feel jealous.

Mutual masturbation for the first time, how to do it?

If you choose to masturbate together, go for a location that makes both of you feel comfortable and safe. Your bed is a good place for example. If you want, you can leave the light on. If you feel a little insecure, then lie under the covers and turn the light off.

You can also masturbate together in the shower or bathtub. Sit on opposite ends of the bathtub for example. That way you have a great view of each other. This is very convenient, because you can see exactly how your partner likes to masturbate.

How can you masturbate together?

There are different ways to masturbate together. Below we will discuss some of the options. Remember that just like during sex, there is no right or wrong, as long as both of you agree to it.

Mutual masturbation

Mutual masturbation is exciting and arousing. By completely focusing on yourself, you can decide your own speed. While masturbating, you can of course kiss each other or touch your partner with your free hand. If your partner puts their arm around you for example, he can still play with your nipples. And you can stimulate his balls or perineum with your free hand. Something that can also be exciting: sit on top of him. He can play with his penis, while you finger yourself. By leaning back a bit, your partner has a fantastic view.

Masturbate alternately

Does the idea of watching each other during mutual masturbation excite you? Then you might want to consider masturbating alternately instead of at the same time. One partner can watch while the other masturbates. Of course you don’t have to alternate if you don’t want to; maybe one partner likes being watched during masturbation, while the other doesn’t. Communication is very important.

While watching a video

Are you both turned on by watching porn? Or does it annoy you that your partner regularly watches sex videos without you? It could be a good idea to watch a video together. You can masturbate when you are lying in bed and watching porn on your phone or television. It can be very arousing to watch your partner being turned on by someone else. Make sure you realize there is a possibility that this could make you feel insecure.

Masturbating with a sex toy

Besides masturbating with your hand, you can of course also use a sex toy. There are many sex toys for both men and women that you can use to masturbate. For men, masturbators are the most used toys. A masturbator is a toy in an oblong casing, with a soft and flexible sleeve inside. The sleeve has a tunnel that simulates the inside of a vagina, anus, or mouth. Thanks to the ridges and other textures, it feels just like the real thing. The suction power is usually adjustable, which makes pleasuring yourself with a masturbator feel very different from masturbating with your own hand.

Women mainly use dildos and vibrators during masturbation. There are many different kinds, so there is an abundance of choice. Do you like internal stimulation? Go for a dildo, rabbit vibrator or G-spot vibrator. External stimulation of the clitoris is also possible: use a wand vibrator or clitoris vibrator for example.

Also read: Top 6 best sex toys for couples

While talking about your fantasies

Do you have certain fantasies you like to think about while masturbating? Try sharing them with your partner. It can be very arousing for your partner to hear that you fantasize about sex with another woman, your favorite singer, or even about your partner having sex with someone else. In the heat of the moment, you might say something you don’t mean, but you can you always hug it out later.

Have you ever masturbated together with your partner?