7 tips to get your partner in the mood

time for sex

In every relationship there comes a moment when you’re in the mood for sex, but your partner isn’t. This is not a big deal and you just have to accept it. However, if this happens often it can negatively affect your relationship. Are you in this situation? Are you going to give up and just masturbate alone? Or are you going to put in some extra work? Give your lover the chance to get in the mood and help him or her as much as you can. There is plenty you can do to get your partner in the mood. Don’t sit around and wait for your partner to change their mind, but get to work! You will need some practical tools to work with, so here are 7 tips to get your partner in the mood for sex.

1. Take the initiative to get your partner in the mood

Taking charge in the bedroom is very sexy. So when you’re horny, take a chance. Your partner will appreciate it if you take the initiative to seduce him or her. Make contact, use your body, and slowly get your partner in the mood. If this doesn’t work, ask your partner what else you can do.

2. Give your partner time to get in the mood

A rejection is not necessarily a closed door. Maybe your partner does want to cuddle, caress, or kiss. If your partner allows physical contact, it could easily get more intimate after a while. If you can kindle the flame a little, it can eventually become an inferno (if you know what I mean).

3. Create the right ambience

If you notice your partner isn’t in the mood, try a little harder. Wear sexy lingerie, light candles, and dim the lights. Put on sensual music and make sure the room smells pleasant (and that you also smell good yourself). If your partner is open to it, you can give him or her a relaxing massage. Especially when your partner isn’t in the mood because of worry or stress, this is the way to go. Use warm oils or a massage candle to treat him or her to a relaxing massage. If it becomes sensual or arousing, it could lead to sex. But maybe not: and that is okay.

4. Watch porn together to get in the mood

To get your partner in the right mood, you can watch a good porn video together. Even when he or she isn’t in the mood yet, it will definitely attract their attention. There is always a wide range of porn videos available online. Take advantage of your partner’s fantasies: does he or she love anal sex or do you both dream of having a threesome? Find a video that features this. Watching porn together won’t just make you horny, but also sexually arouses your partner. Try to get intimate with your partner and experiment with imitating the movements and sex positions featured in the video. A good porn video can make your day much more adventurous.

5. Surprise him or her in the shower

If your partner is in the shower, surprise him or her in a fun way. There is something erotic about having sex in the shower. Not many men and women can resist the temptation when you enter the bathroom in nothing but a towel. Get in the shower with your partner, soap up your partner’s body, and wait until the very end to start touching his or her genitals. If you’ve had the same sexual routine in the bedroom for a long time, then a sexy shower can boost your sex life.

6. Start sexting

If your partner rejected you this morning, you still have the rest of the day to light the fire. Try sending your partner a sexy, but also funny text message. This way, it isn’t too on the nose. Does he or she send a sexy text back? Reply with another sexy message. You can go back and forth and send each other messages all day long. Sexting is the ultimate foreplay with a slow build-up. Perfect for slowly getting in the mood. Send seductive pictures, but always leave something to the imagination, and see how your partner responds to it. Sexting gives you complete creative control, so make sure you build up to a great sexual experience together when you get home.

7. Talk to each other: learn from your partner

If your partner isn’t in the mood right now, your partner can teach you how to get him or her in the mood. Have a conversation about it. Maybe you’ll find out that your partner is mostly in the mood for sex at a certain time during the day. Or that you can help your partner get in the mood by flirting or sending him or her sexy texts beforehand.  You can also ask your partner when he or she is usually in the mood for sex. Together you can look for a way to deal with a situation where only one of you is in the mood.

Always respect each other

Not a tip, but more of a general unwritten rule: respect each other. A rejection from your partner because he or she isn’t in the mood is never personal. So don’t take it badly, even if you tried very hard to ignite the passion. Talk to each other and find out why he or she isn’t in the mood. It probably has nothing to do with your relationship. Maybe your partner worries a lot, experiences work-related stress, or has problems with friends or family members. It can be anything. Help him or her remove those obstacles in order to clear the path to exciting sexual adventures.

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