The important facts about sex they don’t teach you in school

Sex education in schools mainly focuses on how children are conceived and often also on how to prevent it. Still, it’s obvious that that education doesn’t include a lot of information  that’s very important for a healthy sex life. The truth is that these important facts about sex are seldomly taught in school.

Sex in real life is different from porn

The shocking fact is that many young people do not understand that real-life sex is different from what’s seen in porn. It’s extremely important that they learn this. For example, British research shows that more than half of the boys aged 13 and 14 surveyed think porn is realistic. 39% of girls think so, too. The same percentage of boys think they need to imitate what they see in porn movies, while the girls indicated that they were shocked and confused after watching porn for the first time. “It makes me sick thinking about my parents doing something so violent,” one 13-year-old girl responded. Analysis of porn shows that as much as 88% contains physical and verbal aggression towards women. It’s not surprising then that a young girl would be shocked by that.

British research shows that more than half of the boys aged 13 and 14 surveyed think porn is realistic

Foreplay is essential for women

Boys and men can be aroused and ready for penetration within seconds. With girls and women, it takes a lot longer. To prevent pain and other discomfort, foreplay is necessary. In this way, the woman will also get in the mood, penetration will be easier and more pleasurable, and it will be easier for the woman to have an orgasm. This is important to include in sex education, since foreplay is often not really part of the scene in porn.

Important facts about sex: You have to pee after sex

Falling asleep exhausted in each other’s arms after making love may sound romantic, but the reality is different. It’s important to go to the bathroom after sex since a lot of bacteria get spread around the area of your bladder while fucking. Properly using the toilet after sex can reduce your risk of developing a bladder infection, urinary tract infection, or renal pelvic infection.

Also read: Sex education and pop culture: a golden combo!

Consent is necessary

Consent, or permission, is essential. More and more countries are looking at whether sex without consent should be labelled as rape. As times change and it’s not clear to everyone when you should ask for consent, it’s smart to just always do so. For decades, we’ve heard stories in the media of college students being raped at parties while drunk or even unconscious. Obviously, they were unable to consent to sex. Touching or kissing someone should also not be done without consent. Communication is important for a healthy sex life.

Also read: Saying no while you are busy

Condoms don’t protect against everything

Condoms are the only contraceptive that can protect you against STIs. Still, not everyone knows that there are also STIs that a condom cannot protect against. You can transmit HPV through a towel, by touching the penis or the vagina with your hands and fingers, by caressing someone who is infected, or through oral sex. Scabies and pubic lice can also be transmitted despite the use of a condom. By learning about the different types of STIs, you can learn how best to protect yourself.

Parents need to provide information, too

Little attention is paid to sex education at schools. Only 33% of students are taught about the adolescent body and only 25% about sexual boundaries, according to research by the Rutgers Knowledge Centre for Sexuality and the NOS Youth News. If you have children, it’s important to talk about this subject with them. This will help them make good choices when needed: for example, to ask consent, to use a condom, or to accept that they can fall in love with someone of the same sex. In the article below, we talk more about the importance of this.

Also read: The importance of talking about sexuality with your daughter